The Character

     Linda's Dad was a man of many, let's say, moods, just about the time you have had enough of one mood he ups and changes direction, he was quite the character and all about family - when he wasn't thinking about himself.


                                           ___________________________________



    Once back in the 70's he and Mom were visiting us in Nashville, we had been out somewhere and were returning home, it was a beautiful day and because we didn't have air conditioning in our car the windows were down. Dad was riding shotgun as we passed a golf course loaded with golfers. There was a guy on the tee, next to the road, getting ready to swing when Dad slaps the side of the car and yells out  "FORE", for those who don't know, this is a warning that a ball may be headed your way so you should quickly duck out of the way. The golfer who was teeing off was starting his swing when Dad yelled, he missed the ball and everybody with him ducked. Dad was in one of his juvenile moods as he heartily laughed his head off - to him it was a great joke.


                                            ____________________________________


     Another visit took place the week of Christmas about 1975 or 1976. The weather in Tennessee during December is often unpredictable, that year it  was very nice with highs in the low sixties and lows in the forties - light jacket weather for the natives.
    We lived out by the lake then, Mom Dad and Vickie came up from Florida to spend the holidays with us. We were all over the place that week even went for a boat ride. Dad was dressed in layers and constantly wore a football jacket, everywhere he went he complained about how cold it was to anybody who would listen. I had just installed a fireplace and had about two  cords of firewood, Dad kept a fire burning all of the time and even wore his jacket in the house. By the end of the week he had gone through a cord. Ironically, the day we took them to the airport the temperature dropped and it was spitting snow. The temperature continued to drop and New Years Eve it went below zero and stayed there, for two months Linda and I drove to work on a sheet of ice.



                                            ______________________________________


     When we lived in Inglewood Dad came into town for a short visit, Linda and I worked for banks in downtown Nashville and had to dress the part. We lived in a section of town serviced by the metropolitan bus line which Linda used when I wasn't in town.
     Dad liked to brag about all kinds of things, how many fish he caught, how much money he made or about the joke he played on his brother Raymond by writing him a bad check. One of the things he liked to brag about was how cheaply he could outfit himself at flea markets in Florida, white T-shirts for .25 cents, sport shirts for .50 cents and slacks for a couple of dollars, even shoes and coats, he could buy an entire trousseau for twenty dollars.
     Dad took notice that neither of us owned an overcoat, never mind that we didn't want one. He told us about all of the bargains at the flea markets in West Palm Beach, the northerners or Yankees as we called them retired to Florida and brought with them all of their worldly possessions which they soon discovered they either didn't need, want or have room for so they sold these items in the local flea markets.
     Not long after Dad returned home we received a box  from him - it contained a full length overcoat for Linda and one for me. The coats were made of wool and very good quality  at least when they were made in the 1940's. Not long after the coats arrived Dad called to asked if they had arrived, he bragged that he bought them for $3.00 apiece. The coats were way out of style, heavy and itchy so we wound up donating them to a homeless shelter. It was easy to keep the donation a secrete from Dad as he didn't often visit during the winter.



                                            _______________________________________



     Dad's brother Raymond owned a bottled gas company that was once owned by their father. In the mid 1970's Dad bought the Interlochen, Fla location, sold the house in Cocoa and moved Mom and Vickie in to run it while he stayed in West Palm. The operation barely made money if ever and then Mom pulled ten to fifteen percent off the top to give to the church every week. There was a very large gas tank that held a supply of gas to operate with, when it ran low it had to be refilled but Mom seldom had the money to pay. Dad would call Raymond to refill the tank, Raymond would require the money for the gas on delivery and Dad would tell him the check was in the mail or send him a check that was no good, for both of them it was a matter of cash flow. He would eventually make good on the money but in the mean time he thought it was funny that he stiffed his brother.


                                            ________________________________________


     Danny was Dad's first grandchild and one would think that he would be proud and want to see his grandson as much as possible, well Danny was several months old before Dad showed up at the house. It wasn't that he couldn't come up to North Florida, on the contrary Dad drove with in a mile of the house every week on his way to Jacksonville and two days later he drove the same route back to West Palm. He would even call our house on the handheld radio he kept in his truck but he was always too busy to stop.
     Years later the boys wanted to spend time with their Grandfather so Linda let them go. They each had similar experiences, Dad would take them to visit Eileen and leave them for a day or two or pawn them off on his girlfriend overnight or with some other relative or friend. The boys wanted to spend time with him but he had time for every thing but them. After Clay spent a week  Dad asked him, in front of Linda, if he had a good time with his Grandpa - Clay answered in true Clay form "I don't know, you  kept taking me to visit people and left me with them". When Linda found out that Dad left Clay with her cousin Wayne who was usually high on drugs she never again trusted Dad alone with the boys.


                                         ______________________________________


     Dad had a nephew named Wayne. Wayne's father had died about the time Linda and I were dating, Dad had a strange sense of family loyalty and felt that he needed to take care of  Wayne. Wayne on the other hand took advantage of Dad every chance he got  - Wayne was a drug addict.
     Dad took Wayne and his wife to West Palm and put them to work, the wife was an excellent employee an asset to the company. Wayne spent more time in search of drugs or the funds to buy them. Dad complained about Wayne constantly so I asked why he put up with him and Dad said because Wayne was his dead brothers son and his responsibility. Wayne never changed, he died in a drug deal gone bad several years later.


                                            ______________________________________


      Memories come from many different places, I was just watching an old John Wayne movie that had a scene from Jackson Hole, Wyoming. Linda would tell the story about how she fell in a hole in Jackson Hole.
     Back in the late fifties and early sixties Linda's Dad worked for one of the companies that supported the construction of the missile silos that were a part of the nations defense system. Dad was in the supply department and they traveled all over the western states from one state or town to another, Dad used these moves to see the sights one of which was Jackson Hole. While they were touring Jackson Hole Linda stepped into or fell into an open manhole and skinned her leg. She was too young to remember the circumstances but she knew her Dad was pissed at the city and threatened them somehow, he settled when the city paid for the medical bill plus fifty dollars, she was ticked because it was her leg that was injured but Dad kept the money.
     This ties into another story along these lines.  The night we got engaged Dad was not too enthusiastic about gaining a son - in - law and tried to talk us out of it - he lost that battle. I was hitchhiking back and forth to the base and Linda's house so this night Mom decided Dad should drive me back to the base, Linda went along. The next day Linda told me Dad kept up his opposition of our engagement on the way back home, he had hopes that when Linda graduated from high school she would get a job and help support the family.
     Yep Dad was all about the family !


                                            _____________________________________



     Dad and I seemed to rub each other the wrong way at times, we had different views towards life that often clashed. His views on family often ran contrary to my own and we had words to that effect several times, I think we tolerated each other because of Linda and in many ways we were a disappointment to each other. I was never quite good enough for his daughter and he, in my opinion, missed the mark as a father.
     All of this came to an end when he lay in bed in a VA hospice facility, every weekend Linda and I drove to Florida to see him. Linda hovered over him like the dutiful daughter she was, I generally stayed out of the way and was often sitting in a chair reading a book. He was a character to the end, the African American nurses and orderlies he held in such disdain because of their race were now the sweetest and best people he ever met.
     The biggest surprise came the last time we saw him, I was sitting in a chair in his room reading a book as Linda stood by his bed and talked to him, I heard him say " Mike has really turned out to be a good husband for you and I'm happy for you".
     Dad was sometimes hard to figure out alright.